Crazy Things I Did Today

In an effort to execute a "deep clean," I took apart the diaper champ. The top part ended up in four or five different pieces. This would not be that big of a deal to a normal, conscientious person with all their faculties, but that is in no way an accurate description of me at the present. I was thinking about a million other things at the time, wearing gloves (to keep the Clorox wipe juice off my hands), and shaking it to see if I had fixed the previously dumb thing I did a few days ago--trying to wash out the diaper champ with a hose outside. Yes, it does take on water. So, somewhere during all the shaking, wiping, and pulling I found myself surrounded by multiplying pieces of diaper champ. At this point, I started having thoughts of how much money I will have cost us if I failed to pull off this little stunt. But, reason won the day. I told myself this was certainly not rocket science, and I was not the least intelligent person on the earth. And with those two life-affirming truths, I wrestled it back together. The fact that every piece is now thoroughly disinfected is an added bonus.

Today, I also failed to cast a magic spell on Spencer that would have forced him to take a nap. I believe that this is the root cause of the rest of crazy things I did today. Read on.

While talking on the phone for about 5 minute to my husband, I was walked around the kitchen sort of acting like I was cleaning it up. Spencer ran in and out quite a few times, and I gave him some crackers. I had spend most of our napless afternoon cleaning out the "guest room," and I had little piles of recycling and trash that needed to be put into their proper home. And again the neurons began firing in any which way they pleased. Spencer ran back into the room asking for another cracker, and I COULD NOT find the box. My eyes scanned the kitchen at least 20 times. I opened cabinet doors; I even opened the refrigerator. I went into the living room, thinking maybe Spencer somehow got the box of crackers off of the counter and carried it in there. No crackers. Finally, I interrupted whatever sad semblance of a conversation I was carrying on with my husband to tell him that I'd lost the whole box of crackers, and I JUST had them. His reply was kind but bored and disinterested. Finally, I began to walk through the whole house. I found the box of crackers on the desk in the guest room.

After the riveting conversation which, no doubt, reminded my husband of all the reasons he fell in love with me to begin with, I realized that I had started cooking dinner for my child who ate his dinner after his failed nap attempt, my husband who wouldn't be home until late, and myself. I'd forgotten that Jonathan was coming home late tonight. I had called him to tell him his dinner would be ready in about ten minutes. Meanwhile, my mom called and said she had cooked dinner and my dad had to cancel a case so he'd be home in decent time. So, in my own crazy fashion, I took our dinner out of the oven while I dressed and shoe-d my child. I packed a bag (ALWAYS a process, no matter what I do), cleared a shelf in the fridge, put dinner on a trivet in the fridge, and drove Spencer out to my parents house.

If you have a toddler you know where this is going. No nap + driving at dinner = falling asleep in the car seat. And to say that falling asleep in the car seat is equivalent to a tumultuous evening is to understate the situation. There's really no excuse for me doing this. Someday I'm going to learn.

After the fits of screaming that occupied most of my time at my parents house, we finally arrived back home. Since most of the day seemed counterproductive, I needed to feel like I'd accomplished something useful and tangible. So, around 7:45 pm, I started a little project. Spencer has started reaching behind large pieces of heavy furniture to fish out electrical cords and power strips. He loves to unplug them, pull them as far as he can from whatever device they are connected to, etc. Every morning this week, he has come to get me after he's unplugged the television and the dvd player, asking for his movie to be turned back on.

Now, irregardless of how it sounds, we do not have wires flagrantly strewn about. When we moved in four years ago, I "designed" (if you can call it that) our furniture placement, etc. around what would or would not be practical for raising kids. That was my foremost thought and criteria. "Would that look good here? Oh, no, that'd be too easy for a kid to pull over." This was my constant thought process. So, careful planning from a fairly educated adult went into the arrangement. However, in an effort to live within our means, not everything was "perfect," and Spencer has capitalized upon this fatal flaw. So, this evening I rearranged furniture for the sole purpose of making it harder for Spencer to get into mischief.

Is it crazy to rearrange the living room at bed time? Yes. But at least we ended on a high note.